Oh... Home Movies

I am so guilty of the crazy. I am finally going through the footage I shot from August from my last visit home for Ippy's show. I believe the footage that has prompted me to write was a day or so after Ip's show and we were all meeting at Mom and Ip's to have dinner. Sean was cooking and Pat and Cassie came a little later to join us. I wanted to do some shooting of the family while I was there and I thought it would be great to get some footage of Pat and Sean in the kitchen cooking together and since it doesn't happen anymore, I thought - maybe me filming would be an incentive to see it happen and I suggest it to Patrick to help Sean in the kitchen. And he automaticatically gives me a face - that I took as a go take a hike look. Then the anger and passive aggressiveness starts to bubble up inside me. And I captured my very unattractive, at a lack of a better word, rant about the incident and what I chose to do after it - all on my pleasant footage of Sean and Ip playing guitars. It is really astounding to me how much time I take going about things the wrong way. Yes - being direct (always) and sometimes confrontational (sometimes) is can be a good thing and move things along - but being confrontational without being direct and being upset about something that I am actually not upset about - wastes a lot of time and causes a lot of unnecessary heart break. Who knew right? Ha! I have allowed these habits to go on way too long and I am very excited to be starting on that long and tedious journey of a happier / healthier / and more productive and fulfilling life.